New Year

Well it looks like a whole year has come to an end, I know this for a fact because everyone has started making resolutions they are unable or have no intentions of keeping. Personally, I believe that the only person you are lying to in the end is yourself; which is why this year my only thought was that I would make an effort to see people I haven't in a while.
However, even that isn't full proof due to my current grounded status... But then again would I have much of a social life even if I was allowed to go out?? I don't think life would differ much, I would work, I would go to college and I would revise because at the end of the day I do want to make something of myself. Not because it is expected or people doubt me, but because I myself have decided I am better than average.
So a whole year has gone, and what a learning curve it has been. I know I am bound to make some mistakes even repeat some regrets but there is no way I am spouting 'new year, new me' bullshit. There are some parts of my personality that do need renovations but that should be done regardless of whether it's a new year or not. If you are never trying to better yourself then you may as well admit that you have no self worth to speak of. People need to stop looking for flaws in themselves or others and instead look for potential.
What people really fail to realise is that new years eve is just like every other night. Universes don't collide, stars don't change colour and the sun will still set and rise as if nothing notable is occurring, yet worldwide there is breathless wonder at the new beginnings this night will bring, all the chances you now have to mend broken fences. Somehow the depression and the restlessness of your everyday life dissipates on the hopes that the coming year will bring you solace, a night you hope lasts forever but one that is gone before you've even had a chance to embrace it.

I don't mean to be so cynical but sometimes I do wonder if people talk of new beginnings in an attempt to shroud the fact that all they really want is to drink themselves in to oblivion without judgement because it is new year's eve. I think at the moment I am angry, angry that for some reason I can't drown myself in the peaceful ideals that everyone has carved for the start of a new year, instead my year has begun with fights, pain, vomit, tears and death.
I guess life truly isn't perfect.